Author: Phil Hartwick
First Published: 2021
I know, I know; running meetings is such boring stuff… not sexy at all. But….
I have on numerous occasions taught facilitation skills and there was always real interest in tricks and techniques for handling [difficult] people.
Running meetings may not be the most exciting task, but it’s an essential skill. In my experience teaching facilitation, I’ve found that participants are genuinely interested in techniques for handling challenging behaviours in meetings.
First, it’s important to focus on managing challenging behaviours, not labelling people as “difficult.” Even the most challenging individuals respond better when they feel respected, not “managed.” After all, people tend to behave worse when they feel controlled.
Secondly, prevention is key. There are many proactive strategies you can use to discourage disruptive behaviours before they arise in a meeting. This is almost always more effective than trying to “cure” problems once they start.
So let’s explore a few prevention-focused tactics that can help keep meetings running smoothly. These will allow you to stop typical challenging behaviours before they derail the discussion.
Prevention-Focused Tactics
1: Properly preparing your meeting is a key prevention strategy to maximise its focus
Keeping participants engaged is crucial for an effective meeting. Start by clearly communicating the purpose and objectives before and at the start of the meeting. Set realistic time targets and expected outputs for each agenda item. If you fall behind schedule, don’t assume it’s okay – consult the group. Throughout the meeting, use a variety of activities to maintain engagement, such as breaking into smaller discussion groups. [You may also want to read BOOST your team meetings for more tips.] By setting clear expectations and using interactive formats, you can help ensure the meeting time is used productively and efficiently.
2: Establish clear ground rules or expectations with the team as a prevention strategy
Meetings often become frustrating for people due to a few common issues. Dominant, talkative individuals can monopolise the discussion, while some attendees are physically present but mentally checked out, working on other tasks, texting, emailing, or taking phone calls.
To set the right tone and ensure a productive meeting, I like to establish my role as the facilitator early on. I reassure participants that I will be actively managing the session so that everyone can fully benefit from their time.
As part of this, I remind the group about the importance of staying focused. I’ll ask them directly what we need to do to make that happen. If necessary, I’ll suggest agreements such as turning off or putting away devices, refraining from other work, allowing me to interrupt and redirect us, and monitoring individual air time to encourage broader participation.
Establishing these ground rules upfront helps minimise disruptive behaviours. But even with a solid setup, some challenges can still arise during the meeting. I’m prepared to address a range of challenging behaviours using various techniques.
Challenging Behaviours
1: Interrupting or talking over others is a common challenging behaviour
To effectively intervene when someone is being interrupted during a meeting, it’s important to master a few key skills. First, use your body language, gestures, and focused attention to quickly halt the conversation and regain control. This could involve raising your hand, making eye contact, or gently interrupting to say “Hold on a moment.”
It’s also crucial to handle the situation tactfully, ensuring no one feels scolded or that their perspective is less important. A quick, reassuring smile and a promise to circle back to the interrupter can go a long way. The goal is to allow the original speaker to finish their thought, then provide the interrupter an opportunity to share their comments.
By employing these techniques – decisive yet empathetic intervention – you can productively manage interruptions and keep the meeting on track.
2: When subgroups engage in multiple simultaneous conversations
To address side conversations in meetings, I try to intervene early and assertively. If I notice a separate discussion starting, I’ll pause the speaker and turn to the group, saying something like “Can we all stay together here for a moment?” This allows me to regain control of the meeting without making anyone feel scolded or diminished.
I find it’s important to use your whole body and presence to quickly halt the side conversation. Make eye contact, hold up a hand, and focus your attention on the disruptive exchange. At the same time, maintain a friendly, inclusive tone – ask the side-talkers if they have something they’d like to share with the group.
The goal is to redirect the conversation back to the main agenda swiftly, but in a way that doesn’t embarrass or alienate those who got distracted. Handled deftly, this technique can prevent side conversations from derailing the entire meeting.
3: Using phones or other electronic devices during inappropriate times can lead to distractions
If you’ve established a no-device policy and someone disregards it, I discretely let them know I’ve noticed without drawing unwanted attention.
I aim to address it discreetly to avoid embarrassing the person or causing resentment.
For example, I might make eye contact, give a subtle nod, and gesture discreetly toward their device – all with a friendly smile – to signal they should step outside to use it.
4: When one person dominates the conversation
We’ve all encountered people who, despite good intentions, tend to dominate discussions in meetings. This is often due to their passion or extroverted nature. Once you identify these individuals, there are several strategies you can employ.
- To prevent a dominant participant from monopolising the discussion, make it clear at the start that you want contributions from everyone. Communicate the meeting agenda in advance and state that all attendees’ views will be requested.
- During the meeting, visibly shift your attention and eye contact away from the dominant participant and towards others when asking questions.
- You might also say something like: “I think it would be good to hear a range of perspectives on this topic.”
- When the dominant participant is speaking, you can try to move the discussion forward by standing up, turning towards the whiteboard, or signalling that you need to move on.
- When the dominant participant is about to speak, politely ask them to share their views “briefly, if that’s okay.”
Effective meeting facilitation requires skilfully managing common disruptive behaviours that can undermine collaboration and team progress. A skilled leader can guide the group to address these challenges rather than simply tolerating them. The way you facilitate your meetings can make the difference between a successful, cohesive team and one that struggles to work together effectively.
Facilitation requires carefully balancing a team’s progress and participation to maximise its potential. Facilitators must leverage the team’s diverse perspectives and experiences while also ensuring tangible outcomes are achieved. This delicate balance is rarely maintained without someone proactively managing any challenging team dynamics.